well the two way exprssion is possible. Its just that its impossible to key properly! Since thsi si realy a gui realm issue and not a dg thing, a scriptjob working on selection change is the sanest mel solution (theres a much better api trick available).
If you want to key the attruibute now or in any foreseeable future, you should set up a scriptjob that.
swaps any inbound connection to the currently used nodesconnets the output of this node to the other node in teh chainOn release connects the upsteream once again backThis ensures rudimenttary keyabiliy, however there still a probklem what if someone has both objects selected and changes teh value collectively. (maya does this, if you have two same namied channels and multislelect maya will change them all at once)